What if?

    Have you ever wondered what you life would be like if you had never _________? I do. It is the inevitable "what if".  Every time I come back home, I can't help but wonder what my life would look like today had we never left. Who would my friends be? Where would  we be working? Would we even have Addi? (probably not.... it was pretty circumstantial, but that is a story for another day).

    The truth of the matter is I was suffocating in Kearney. Everything was WAY too comfortable and I was stagnant.... dying (spiritually speaking). Houston caused me to stretch... grow... change. I needed to be uncomfortable for awhile. I needed to learn how to depend on Christ because everything back home came so easily. I needed to learn to have a relationship with my husband that allowed us to work together, learn together, and grow together. And the truth of the matter is that there were some things might have been a little bit too much to handle if we had stayed as well. God knew....... knows.

    I am thankful for the life that I have. The good and the bad..... the hard and the easy...... the ugly and the beautiful.

Adventures of Growing Up

My baby girl really isn't a baby anymore. Big changes are happening and I am squeezing tight to the last baby moments that I am allowed to have with Addileigh Grace. Time moves so fast and it has never been more evident until the moment you watch a baby grow into a child. I am savoring and drinking deep.... holding onto each new moment like a precious jewel.
Addi likes to grow up fast too........ none of this waiting for mommy to be ready stuff. She is constantly hitting new milestones months before many babies her age do. She storms ahead, looking for new adventures and obstacles to overcome. Meanwhile her Daddy and I are holding onto the tail of her little skirts as she skips by, hoping we don't miss a moment.

New Playhouse

Big Girl Bed

Is any parent ready for this moment? It is like the ultimate switch from infant to toddler and Addi was ready to jump in full force. Daddy shed a tear watching his baby falling asleep in her "big girl bed" and my tears came as the crib officially exited her room and was moved into baby brothers.

As I cleaned all of Addi's old things for the arrival of her baby brother, Addi had other plans.

Picture Mania!

Months with no computer = hundreds of pictures! Get ready for the madness over the next couple of days!!

A Concept Called "Waiting"

Hey Friends! I have missed blogging and really I won't be able to do it regularly for awhile. The class I was taking is finally over which allows me more time to do things like blogging (it is amazing how clean my house has been this past week), but our computer is broken. It seems there is a long list of expenses that come before getting the computer fixed. Right now, I am sitting in Andy's classroom while he is working a special event for his school. Addi is coloring on a big piece of blue paper and I am free to do a little writing. The filter on this computer is wicked tight.... I can't even check my UNK email account! I have a ton of random pictures to post and I think when our computer is up and running, my blog will look like a large electronic photo album...fun for all, right?

I was laying in bed thinking last night... this happens regularly and keeps me from falling asleep for a good half hour most nights. I was thinking that some of the hardest words to hear after praying and praying is.....

WAIT
               Be Patient
                                   Leave it with me ..................
Andy and I have been praying that he would find a summer job to help with hospital bills in August (as well as to help with other needs), but every door seems to be slammed in our face. Last summer he did summer school, but the state budget cuts have been fierce and hiring opportunities are slim. Honestly, I am just thankful he still has a teaching job as thousands in Houston have lost theirs, but that is a whole separate topic. Anyway, he has been sending in applications for over a month and every application comes back empty. While getting ready the other day, I finally just asked " God, what do you need from me?" I have felt like the trials in life recently have come with long waits and just once it, would be nice if a need was just met immediately. I just want it to be taken care of NOW. As I was processing all of this, God literally spoke through the radio. A man giving a message on Christian radio said, "Just leave it with Chirst".......ummmmmm not what I wanted to hear. Just leave it???? Me?.... the most impatient person in the world?
I had to sit. Think. I guess I had always thought you had to pray the death out of things. I thought I needed to ask and ask and ask until it was answered in some form. To just LEAVE IT with Christ was a concept that had never occurred to me... it was just to.... easy. So, I swallowed hard and said "OK".  Who knew peace could come from walking away from something that you desperately need and want to happen? It still taps on the back of my mind, but when the tapping comes so does a strong voice saying "just wait".  So here I sit.. waiting.

Anyway friends, that's life!

P.S. I am still planning on doing a blog on how to save money, but I am going to need more time then what I am allowed at the library or Andy's classroom.

Happy Easter!!

Easter is a celebration of new beginnings, forgiveness, and fresh starts.... that's exactly what we did!

Calling All Mommies.... I Need YOU!

One of the things I miss most about Nebraska is all the stay at home mommies who have to really stretch their budget to make ends meet.... like me! Now I have no doubt that somewhere in this huge city are moms in the same boat, trying to squeeze every ounce out of their pennies. So my dear mommy friends..... I want to know your secrets!!! Leave me a comment, a facebook message, WHATEVER and tell me all your amazing ways YOU save money......I would LOVE to know!! I am talking homemade cleaners, cheap recipes, frugal activities and crafts... ANYTHING AND EVERYTHING! To show my appreciation, I will compile everything I learn on my blog so that every other mommy who is interested (and reads this blog) can pick up a few new tricks too!! Sound like a deal????

Motherhood (and amazingly random pictures)

It is incredible how amazingly naive we are about parenthood before (and probably during) we become parents. I can't tell you how many times I said , " Well, if that was MY child, they would never get away with THAT" or " My child will smile and say hi when somebody speaks to them" or how about " I will never do that". Ummmm, yeah. We can make plans until we are blue in the face, but those little ones don't give a rip!

We try to tell all the newcomers about how plans fly out the window, but you know what??... they aren't going to get it until they experience it! I honestly thought I had very little expectation about how my baby was going to be, but when I found myself crying in the living room at 2 am I realized just how clueless I was..... as do we all. So, dear friends here is the top FOUR things I have learned so far (I know.... only four?? Maybe I will write more later, but for right now we are going to go with just these :)

#1 Don't Let The Hard Moments Ruin Your Perspective

Gosh, I spent so much time early on stressing over Addi crying and focusing on how she wasn't an "easy" baby and I honestly feel like I really missed out on all those sweet memories that I could have had. I look back on her tiny baby pictures and think, "I missed it!!!" I wanted her to grow up so badly, so it would be easier, that I skipped out on appreciating her chubby cheeks and baby coos. I am determined with this next one to savor those sweet newborn days... they are worth cherishing (even if they are hard).

Now that she is a little older (and a little easier) I so often find myself just stopping and taking it in. These babies have so much to teach us.... so much to offer. When it's hard, we push through, but when it is good we drink it in ...... deep! I try so hard to burn those sweet times into my head because I know they are gone in an instant.

#2 Don't Compare

God creates our babies unique... they are his masterpiece, why would we want to change that? Appearances can be deceiving!! Just because somebody elses baby acts perfect whenever you see it doesn't mean that he/she is perfect all the time. Sometimes I look at other people's children and think, " Does this baby ever cry?" or "Why won't my baby let anybody hold them, but theirs will?" Because they are two different babies. Addi is not a fan of being away from mommy (which is frustrating for me sometimes), but she is INCREDIBLE when we go on outings! She can totally fly by the seat of her pants and be happy with whatever I plan out for the day. My baby girl loves playing and is totally content playing by herself on the floor for a long time. All kids have strength and weakness, be thankful for the good things you see in your child... it is a gift from God.

#3 Take A Chill Pill About The House

Ok, my it is just me, but I like my house clean and orderly. I am LEARNING (process) that the housework can wait. Addi needs me more then my house does. PRIORITIES. I am not saying that it is wrong to want a clean and orderly home, but we can't let it tromp what really matters. Plus, the second you clean it, somebody is messing up again :)

See this baby doll?? It is such a huge part of Addi's day! She thinks she is a little mommy.... I mean we change the diaper, wrap baby in a blanket (a million times over) and take it on walks. I am pretty excited to see her pretending and being so nuturing. I am hoping it carries over to baby brother :)

#4 Take Advice With a Grain of Salt

Ok, I LOVE telling people about my experience as a mommy. It is such a huge part of who I am right now and I love sharing it with my other mommy friends. I think listening to what other moms have to say is a great thing, BUT you have to realize that you are your own person. Sometimes the advice another mom has to offer doesn't really fit you or your baby. That's ok. Figure out what works for you! However, moms do know what they are talking about and so sometimes listening can really help you out. When I see other moms try things that I didn't, I always ask how it worked for them. I guess what I am getting at is listen, learn, and take what works for you and your kiddo.