Moments from Home

 We spent a month back home in Nebraska. It was good. Life is simple and moves at a much slower pace. Addi got way more attention then she needed, but what are grandparents and great grandparents for, right?

I loved how people kept commenting about how hot I had to be while I was thinking, "are you kidding? The weather is amazing compared to what I am headed back to". We enjoyed our month away from reality, but it is always nice to come back to your own house.... where everything is yours and routines are set. I have no desire to ever move back to Nebraska, but it really is a great state :)

Frugalicious

So, as a mom on a tight budget, it has been my goal to save money in both small and big ways. As a girl, I remember my mom doing all sorts of creative things to save a penny or two (hey, they add up). Interesting how often I find myself in her shoes, looking for easy and effiecient ways to keep the grocery, utility, entertainment, etc bills down. I know I am not alone in this as both working moms and stay -at -home moms are trying to be creative in order to make their small budgets stretch farther. So begins my monthly post on ways to save money. Meet Frugalicious! I think this will be a fun experience and I am excited not only to educate myself on saving money, but those who care to follow along. Are you READY???

Borax is the BOMB!

I have heard rumors about how awesome Borax is and I have been wanting to give it a try for awhile. Well, this is the week I am jumping in and going crazy .... (and although it is not gracing my cubbards yet, it soon will be).  I took a little trip over to their website and was in shock by the number of things Borax can be used for. Not only is it a cheap laundry detergent, it can be used for anything from a kitchen cleaner to crafts. Hello! Multi-purpose uses is like a penny-stretchers heaven! This box of awesome is not only useful on many levels, but it's CHEAP..... music to my ears!

Check out their website below and be blown away!
http://www.20muleteamlaundry.com/about

p.s. Let me know if you have ever used Borax in your house OR if you are going to give it a try.

p.p.s I don't think spell checker is working and as we all know.. I am not a good speller (so pardon my mistakes)

Venting

I don't blog very much anymore. Really, I have sort of pulled out of the whole blogging world for awhile. I needed to clear my head and get refocused. I was being sucked in by images of perfect mothers with perfect blogs.... I wanted to be one. I wanted to have tons of followers who thought my life looked pretty good.... maybe it would make me feel more secure. So, I took a break (part of which was forced since I didn't have a computer that worked for over a month) and it has been really good. I feel like I have given my insecurities up and I am refocused. I don't know how much I will really be able to blog now that I am weeks away from baby boy arriving. If this one is anything like Addi girl, then I will be pretty busy.... not to mention  I will already be chasing a very active 20month old around the house.


    So, speaking of insecurities.... that is what has brought me to this page today. I got hit hard today and the only thing that will make me feel better is writing about it. I have a hunch that most women deal with it, but few rarely talk about it.  Yah know, being MISUNDERSTOOD. I know I have mentioned it before on a post or two before, but it has been creeping up a lot lately and I just need to get it out.


    I recently had a friend who titled her blog "Wanted: Friends" or something along that line. I wanted to stamp a big red Ditto behind it. I have lived in Houston 2 1/2 years and I still have yet to find a close friend. I guess I should explain that I don't do "casual" friends well. Meaning, a friend is not really a close friend to me unless I can call her up and say, "hey, it's me". I get that I am not that easy to get to know. I am a horrible small talker and tend to just hide in the corner, hoping nobody will notice.I don't try to put walls up, but I am sure that I do. I think I am pretty cool though, once you get to know me. I have often wanted to ask somebody, " so what is it? why does nobody seem interested in being my friend?" Although that seems like something that should come out of an eight year old, I am seriously curious... kinda. Part of me really doesn't want to hear what the other person might have to say.
     However, I have to say that Houston has been hard, especially on the friend realm. I have a hard time relating to a lot of people here. It's not like Nebraska. Money seems to be rather important to most (not all) people and let's just say..... we don't have a ton. I am not used to wealth and things being so highly valued. The women I knew back home were stay at home moms who had to scrape their pennies together to make ends meet. That is what I know... what I am comfortable with. It is a life that I choose for myself a long time ago. But money isn't the only thing, my interests/enjoyments/views/priorities just don't seem to line up. Some days I feel like an alien living on another planet. It can be kind of lonely. I just want somebody who gets it.... me. I know many women who move to a new place deal with it. Some for years and years... it can take time. I have just never been known to be extremely patient.
    And then there is motherhood. I think most mom's struggle with comparison. I am not even talking about comparison of their children (which happens a lot too), I am talking parenting methods. I think it can be really easy to forget that we all have different children and have to approach things differently. For example, Addi has been extremely resistant to other people ..really up until a month ago. Whenever I left her with anybody other than Andy or I she would cry and cry and cry. SO, Andy and I have really held off leaving her with other people simply because we felt bad for the person watching her. I don't care if she cries, but what babysitter wants to be left alone with a crying baby for hours? Not me. Poor Addi girl is so misunderstood too. I get the feeling that many people think she is cold and angry because she isn't one of those babies who will just smile for anyone. A parent who has a happy-go-lucky baby (or no children at all), however, may not get it. I feel like I get perceived as a mother who is too afraid to leave her kid with somebody..... SO not true. I would happily leave her with a sitter, but the sitter would have had to be checked into a mental hospital by the time she left.
   The truth is, I am so guilty of comparisons too though. I am a pretty laid back parent. I don't tend to freak out over "minor" things. I didn't call Addi's pediatrician once and I only took her in for shots. But that is the thing, they are only minor to me and I can't be the judge of that for other parents. I guess I am encouraging us all to cool it on the judging aspect and take a moment to try to see it from other eyes. (and maybe nobody is judging me at all and I am just putting this all on myself)


    Insecurities. That's all it is. Insecurities about appearances. Thankfully, I am pretty good at catching it right away and taking it straight to God, but sometimes they will continue to peck on my mind and I let them get the best of me. I feel like when I put it out there and actually say it...acknowledge it, then it is easier for me to move on. I KNOW that so many other women deal with it and maybe we can all work through it together. Why do it alone? For me personally, it only tends to keep growing when I keep it shoved in a corner.


P.S. I am going to try to blog more. I love it. However, it is all based on how much free time I will actually have. Thanks to those who let me know they  miss my blog :) It makes me feel really special knowing that you actually care and enjoy reading.

What if?

    Have you ever wondered what you life would be like if you had never _________? I do. It is the inevitable "what if".  Every time I come back home, I can't help but wonder what my life would look like today had we never left. Who would my friends be? Where would  we be working? Would we even have Addi? (probably not.... it was pretty circumstantial, but that is a story for another day).

    The truth of the matter is I was suffocating in Kearney. Everything was WAY too comfortable and I was stagnant.... dying (spiritually speaking). Houston caused me to stretch... grow... change. I needed to be uncomfortable for awhile. I needed to learn how to depend on Christ because everything back home came so easily. I needed to learn to have a relationship with my husband that allowed us to work together, learn together, and grow together. And the truth of the matter is that there were some things might have been a little bit too much to handle if we had stayed as well. God knew....... knows.

    I am thankful for the life that I have. The good and the bad..... the hard and the easy...... the ugly and the beautiful.

Adventures of Growing Up

My baby girl really isn't a baby anymore. Big changes are happening and I am squeezing tight to the last baby moments that I am allowed to have with Addileigh Grace. Time moves so fast and it has never been more evident until the moment you watch a baby grow into a child. I am savoring and drinking deep.... holding onto each new moment like a precious jewel.
Addi likes to grow up fast too........ none of this waiting for mommy to be ready stuff. She is constantly hitting new milestones months before many babies her age do. She storms ahead, looking for new adventures and obstacles to overcome. Meanwhile her Daddy and I are holding onto the tail of her little skirts as she skips by, hoping we don't miss a moment.

New Playhouse

Big Girl Bed

Is any parent ready for this moment? It is like the ultimate switch from infant to toddler and Addi was ready to jump in full force. Daddy shed a tear watching his baby falling asleep in her "big girl bed" and my tears came as the crib officially exited her room and was moved into baby brothers.

As I cleaned all of Addi's old things for the arrival of her baby brother, Addi had other plans.

Picture Mania!

Months with no computer = hundreds of pictures! Get ready for the madness over the next couple of days!!